God’s Still Small Voice

“It is enough; now, O Lord, take away my life; for I am no better than my fathers.” – The Prophet Elijah (1 Kings 19:4)

I hate to admit that I have prayed this prayer many times in my life. I’ve struggled to find meaning. I’ve struggled to find the will to go on. I’ve looked back at all that I have done, and seen it as a total failure; I am no better than my fathers. I still struggle but not as much: this book helped me learn a great deal about myself and why I struggle.

Elijah didn’t really want to die. He just wanted out, he wanted to quit, he was done. He had had enough of Ahab, Jezebel, Baal, and rebellious Israel. Notice that this “depression” happens shortly after defeating the Prophets of Baal. Oh, how often the devil attacks shortly after a powerful spiritual experience: prophetic word, spiritual retreat, etc!! If Elijah really wanted to die, he could have simply waited on Jezebel’s troops to fulfill her vow to slit his throat!

Rather, Elijah runs. He flees [forty days and forty nights] into the mountain alone. He goes on a self-directed retreat with only himself and God. Elijah encounters a great and strong wind… but the Lord was not in the wind. It is as though the Lord is telling us, “The winds and powers of this world will blow. They will show forth great power and strength. Politics will rage, men will destroy, and the evil one will make a great show. But it is not me. I am not the storm.”

After the storm, a mighty earthquake shakes the foundation of the mountain. It is as though the Lord is telling us, “The world will appear to be falling around us. The things of this world that we have built up, the things that seem so sound and safe will rock. Empires will come and they will go. Financial foundations will rock and teeter. But it is not me, I am not the earthquake.“

Fire follows the earthquake. It is as though the Lord is telling us, “The fires and desires of men will consume all things. Enticed by the evil one, the fires of lust, greed, pride, anger, and every sin will burn all in their path. But it is not me, I am not the fire.”

Following all of these powerful shows of force the Lord appears as a whispering voice. He says to Elijah (and to us), “What are you doing here?” “What are you doing here? I have a plan for you, a plan for good and not evil. You are my prophet. Speak with my still, small voice words of wisdom to your house, to your children, to your friends, to your coworkers, to your community, to your country, to the world. There is no need for you to use force or fire, use rather my whispering voice by way of your example; in the way you live your life. By this you will turn even Ahab back to me! Arise from your depression, trust in my plan for your life, ‘Go, return on your way to the wilderness of Damascus’; get back on the path. Teach those who will follow in your footsteps – Elisha, your children, grandchildren, and others I send to you and you to them. There is much yet for you to do. Return to the mountain, the Rock, the Church when you need a break, but do not stop. Do not give up! Eat (my flesh), refresh yourself (in confession), gain strength (in my word) and continue on. If you do this, one day you too will cry out like Peter, ‘It is good that we are here’ as you stand upon my holy mountain with Elijah, Moses, Jesus, and all those who keep my word.”

Don’t give up. Take a break if you need to (and you will need to). Trust that God has a plan for your life. Elijah couldn’t see it. Peter couldn’t see it. David couldn’t see it. Abraham couldn’t see it… There is no worse feeling than that of feeling alone (especially in the midst of loved ones). But you are not alone. It is Satan who wants to you feel as though you are alone. He is the Devil, Diablo, his very name means “the divider”. He wants to divide you from others. He wants to divide you from your mission and from God. He wants to isolate you and make you feel unloved and unlovable. God loves you and is constantly calling out to you. Even in the midst of the storms, earthquakes, and fires of life He is calling. Listen not to those things. Take a moment to find quiet and you will hear His still small voice that in each word the echo of “I love you” can be heard.